what i give to you
sometimes i wonder what the devastation will be like if this ever ends, what kind of a wreck i will be. in my head i can picture the explosion, the debris, the destruction of everything good in me because i really have no idea what i'll do without the love i have for you.
and sometimes i feel like i am just waiting for it all to fall apart, and i hate that i feel like that. i hate that i have such a hard time accepting a good thing, i'm always waiting for it to be taken away. part of me is always going to be waiting for the day you no longer want me.
but the other part is always going to be hoping that day never comes.