what i want to say is full of words that won't come out quite right, as though these words would be better as music and sound rather than something so concrete. you make me wish these hands had any talent at making music because i'd write you a song that sounds like a rush, the flutter of hearts, unsettled hands, your breath against my ear. instead i'll strum my fingers against your skin as if you are the guitar and the music is the way you sigh or the way you hold me against you trying to mould me into all the parts of you. daily i think, what am i getting myself into? because every time you make me smile i get a little more scared about the miles i'm putting between us in a countable number of days, scared about the way your voice and your words and your smell send a rush through my chest that i feel in my toes, like i'm filled up with gold and i can feel it shining through my skin. you see it in my eyes when i can't hide how i feel, when i'm daydreaming about you with you right there because when you're around i don't think about anything else. i glow for you.