i'm a rock, you're a gull
the issue is this: i love you, you are a beautiful and wonderful human being, and when we are together i don't see anyone else. when i am with you, physically with you, i want to curl up beside you and never leave. but. when we live far away from each other, it becomes glaringly obvious that we have absolutely nothing to talk about together. i can't talk to you about the courses i'm taking or the people i'm spending my time with or the feminist literature i am constantly being exposed to because you aren't interested and it's a waste of my time to bother because you will just inevitably change the subject. and you can't talk to me about your scientific weather anomalies and the possibility of apocalypse because they just aren't things that interest me beyond basic curiosity.
i don't know what to do about this. can we build a solid, functional relationship without having anything to say to each other? is building a relationship based solely on physical comfort the definition of "settling"? should i stay with you just because you know more about me than most people, even though you don't understand me anyway? is the fact that i have to medicate myself for the sake of our relationship a sign that we're doing the wrong thing, pushing too hard at something that just won't give?
i don't think i have it in me to break up with you again. i can't do it if i'm not absolutely certain i won't go back, and how can i possibly have that kind of certainty when so far i haven't been able to stop myself from going back?