what it means to be the kind of people who are obsessed with love: you get swallowed up in the pursuit and regardless of what you admit to, it's what you revolve your entire life around. fuck what future plans you have, fuck how you've mapped out your career, when it comes down to it you'd give up everything you've built for the real thing because you're not stupid enough to forget what it's worth or how rare it really is. we chase love, we never really grow up, we're caught in this fairy tale of peter pan and wendy where you stay in neverland and keep falling in love with mermaids and a girl who tells the best kinds of stories. i'll grow old with you but i'm not growing up, you make my heart feel in colours, these glowing azure and magenta and violet shades, like something i knew when i was very small and then forgot about until i met you. it's not possible to feel adult when you feel this light and sweet; i associate adultness with a certain sobriety and somberness that i've never really felt. i don't know how to take things seriously anymore, not really, everything seems like a part of this big game everyone is stuck in. they make you think you need to keep leveling up but really there's nothing wrong with staying in level two or level one or wherever you end up, advancing to the next level is an option, not a requirement. i want to keep my heart, i don't want to lose it in the greed of the game. the greed of "success".
in any case i'll pass on the message that none of this matters to me while i'm still in your heart because all i ever really cared about was finding someone who loved me as much as i love them; i'm happy in a completely soul-deep kind of way because no matter what happens, i still have something to smile about every single day. what more is there to "success" than that?